Thailand is a dream destination for many people around the world. Although it has many dreamy qualities, it has an ugly side too. Here are just a few of my experiences in Thailand which have caused me to develop a love/hate relationship with this country.

Thailand also has an ugly side

1) On the 1st day, we almost got sucked into the seedy side of Bangkok in a similar fashion as The Hangover 2, but it could have turned out much worse because we are females & didn’t have trusty problem solver Bradley Cooper on our side. All of which occurred while we were simply trying to be friendly with the locals.

A Thai local who tried to drag us to the seedier side of Bangkok

2) On the 1st day, we did get sucked into the full-moon “trains are full scam” & were charged 3 times the going rate for the bus. ($40+ USD per person for 1 way to Koh Samui is likely unprecedented and they most assuredly had a banquet in our honor later the same evening)

3) On my 3rd day, we discovered several fellow passengers were “separated” from their belongings on that same bus through an inside job.

4) The sheep herder mentality of the tourism industry in Thailand is one of the worst I’ve experienced. Once on a Thai bus or van, you seemingly become their “property” and I felt similar to a victim of human smuggling. Although they speak English well enough, they neither explain or comfort you whatsoever along the journey. Once, we were dropped off at a house in the middle of nowhere for our “connection” and simply told to wait indefinitely. In Phuket, a group of us were abandoned at a remote police station to fend for ourselves in finding a taxi in the middle of the night. (Thankfully the police were awake and made some phone calls arranging three taxis for us)

Typical Thai Bus (aka Sheep Herder Bus)

5) When asking for a specific bank’s nearest ATM, I was told it was a few blocks away and would cost 100 Baht on a motobike (=3.3 USD). First, a dollar a block is outrageous in a taxi, let alone a tuk tuk. Thus, 100 Baht was definitely not gonna come out of my wallet for a ride on the back of a moto. So, I smiled & told the guy “I’m not stupid.” Seconds later I see the ATM for the bank I was looking for at the end of the block on which we were standing. (mind you, I showed them an old ATM receipt with the bank logo – one of the most common banks in Thailand. Thus, no confusion could be had on their part)

6) I have spent a lot of time at BKK airport in the past few months (like 60 hrs 2 minutes & 35 seconds give or take a few hours/minutes/seconds). Last time, I was approached by 4 Indian men who seemed friendly enough. (No offense to Indians, it’s just what sparked the conversation since I’d recently been to India) Within minutes, they were trying to persuade me to ditch my plans of volunteering in Cambodia to join them in Pattaya as if I were a prostitute. And, a very nice Thai lady wanted to take me home with her so I wouldn’t have to wait at the airport until 10am. (could have been innocent enough on her part, but still an awkwardly random experience for me)

7) Phuket deserves special mention:

a) At Patong beach, we almost got sucked into the Absolute Hotel scratch card scam, but thank goodness for Google on that one.

b) You literally cannot walk down Bangla Road in Patong without being accosted by the guys showing nudie cards of ping-pong shows & various other sexual performances available. We tried to avoid running into them several times, but to no avail. (Khao San Rd in Bangkok can’t even compete with Bangla Rd in this regard)

c) Per capita, I truly believe Patong is more overly sexualized than bangkok. At least there are some tourist activities in Bangkok, such as the royal palace or floating markets.

d) Lastly, to Patong’s detriment, there appear to be more visible elderly male expats who’ve set up business for the wrong reasons if you know what I mean. Or, more elderly white men hanging around solo for “no particular reason.”

(So, literally I say fuck Patong beach on Phuket. I’ll sail from your ports, but will not support your economic growth (unless the ferries are harbored due to the weather of course))

e) This list doesn’t even take into account a random shooting incident we witnessed on Nai Thon beach which drove us away and down to Patong to begin with. (an entire post will likely be devoted to that someday since Linda’s not-so-ninja-like evasion moves still cause us to bust a gut)

Phi Phi's beautiful longtail boats & beaches

8) So, on to my beloved Phi Phi & why I hate thee too at times:

a) They collect 20 baht at the pier to keep Phi Phi “Sparkling Clean,” but there are no public garbage receptacles to be found anywhere on the island, let alone on it’s idyllic beaches. I’d gladly give double or more if I knew it was being put to such actual use. (when local businesses host clean-up events with their own time, energy & money, obviously the coin is missing the wishing well somehow)

Sign @ Phi Phi's Pier - Good Intentions or Misleading?

b) Buckets – can I say suck it?

c) Sadly, Phi Phi is overbuilt, overpopulated & overtaxed environmentally. Even more sad is the fact it appears many local residents are more concerned with the instant gratification the island is currently receiving in tourist dollars. They do not seem concerned about sustaining the environmental balance of a world renowned and geographically astounding tourist destination, let alone their children’s future.

Blue View Divers arranged a clean-up in August of this debris and the rest of Loh Dalum Bay

d) The sheer number of men (and probably women) literally pissing in the ocean each night at the beach clubs is definitely cause for concern. At any given time, one might see 10-15 guys peeing at once into the “waters” on Loh Dalum bay, with no respect for tides, sanitation or the unrecovered tsunami victims they may be pissing on. (But you know how you can sober up a pisser really quick? Tell them, the people of Phi Phi consider what they are doing to be disrespecting the dead. I have had many guys apologize to me when completely sober the next day)

After spending over two months in Thailand, I don’t believe a damn word anyone tells me. Unless they are my friends from Phi Phi. And, even then, I’ll half believe them if they are drunk, but if their first name is Mark, well then, they have no chance :)

Phi Phi's de facto trash pit at an abandoned building

(Disclaimer: I have spent about 70 days in Thailand at the time of writing, 2/3 of which has been on Koh Phi Phi. However, sometimes when I hate something so much I have to go back & try again (which also explains some of my failed relationships) ‘Tis the nature of a perfectionist to leave no stone unturned. Regardless, I do love Thailand for many reasons as well and will also publish a post soon about why I love Thailand. My current love/hate relationship)